When you look back on your past, how do you feel? Do you worry that people will judge you for things done long ago? Are you worried about how to overcome your past mistakes, or how to overcome the fear of failure and rejection?
Thinking about overcoming your past can feel isolating, but the truth is that you are not alone. Everyone has done things that they regret, but that shouldn’t stop you from doing things like starting a business and taking control of your life.
Sometimes you can’t see the picture because you’re in the frame- it can be hard to see how your life can change and see the bigger picture when you’re in the thick of it! We’re here to help you get out of that mindset and show you how to overcome your past and your fear of criticism and rejection so that you can thrive as an entrepreneur.
You Are Not Alone
When you think about your identity– what makes you fundamentally you– there’s more to it than just your past experiences. The first thing you should do when you’re working on overcoming your fears and insecurities about your past is to realize that you exist in the world around you, and you have some power to change that environment! There are three major aspects of your life that you can change: people, places, and things.
What kind of people do you surround yourself with? Helpful mentors? A strong community? It can be hard to change up your community and the circles of people around you, but it’s worth it to find supportive people.
It’s also important to remember that people and our relationships with them can change. If you tie your whole identity to your relationship with a person, this can be dangerous if that relationship ever changes. You need to surround yourself with good people, but also keep your own identity separate from how you relate to them!
Have you ever gardened, or planted a seed? If so, then you know that it can be hard to know exactly what a seed needs, because each type of plant is different. But if we think of ourselves as sprouting seeds, there are some things that all seeds need. The first thing is good soil. That’s our environment.
There’s no way that a plant can grow and flourish, no matter how well you water and fertilize it if it’s on concrete and doesn’t have good dirt. But once that seed’s in the right environment, the first thing that happens is that it changes. It opens and begins to blossom. The right environment changes you and challenges you. It pushes you out of your comfort zone and helps you to grow.
Another element of overcoming your past and thriving is to remember that you can change the things you do. Let’s go back to our gardening metaphor. Seasons change, and what a plant does in spring needs to be different than what it does in winter. Your habits and decisions can get you through the dark times and help you bloom in the good times. Don’t plant your flag in one season– always be ready to change things when they stop working.
It’s important to remember that your decisions determine your destiny. Not your education level, gender, or anything else about you– it’s the decisions you make about the things that you do. When you change these things, you’re taking control of your own destiny.
Who Are You?
When you put all of these pieces together, you can overcome your past and own your present. The two most powerful words in the English language are “I am.” It’s up to you to decide what comes after that. Whatever comes after the “I am” is the label you’re giving yourself.
When you give yourself a negative label or a limiting label, you’re telling yourself that you’re less than what you really are. And some labels are more limiting than you might think! When you identify what you do with who you are, you’re making yourself unnecessarily vulnerable to changing circumstances. You are more than just your job. When you find out who you are on the inside, outside of work, relationships, and everything that isn’t intrinsically you, that’s how you can overcome that fear of rejection, shame, and criticism.
Only you can validate your identity. This is a big shift because we’re conditioned to define ourselves by what we do. But when you overcome this mindset, you can take control of your own narrative through the power of your words. This is so important to remember when you’re starting a small business– you don’t want to let that business own you! Instead, you need to own it by remaining strong in your identity.
If you’re ready to overcome your past and start thriving as an entrepreneur, you should join our community of Rainmaker Families! When you take the Rainmaker Family Challenge, you gain access to a strong community of business owners who are growing together and learning how to make it work. Join us and learn how to make it rain!